Copywriting

Below you'll find a small selection of my copywriting and translation work, from product reviews, to SEO blurbs, to campaign texts. 

 
 

The Nov. 2018 translation of Erasmus University Rotterdam’s alumni magazine, “EA”.

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‘I guess it’s still those roots. The way Lohues talked about the people and the nature, that love for earthly matters. The poems by Rutger Kopland have the same quality, that earthy element. And of course the fact that Emmen is now participating in the Premier Division – that helped along the emotion.’


Monthly reviews for Platypus Press’ “The Weekend Review”

At the end of Mean Girls (2004), right after all the girls share their insecurities and crowd-dive off of a stage, Regina George learns of the extent of Cady’s betrayal. She storms off, and when Cady chases after her to apologize, Regina turns around in the middle of the road and delivers a mean-girl-speech crescendo. “You know what everyone says about you?” she asks Cady. “That you’re a home-schooled jungle freak who’s a less-hot version of me. So don’t try to act so innocent. You can take your fake apology, and shove it right up your hairy—”
And that’s when Regina George gets hit by a bus.

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Zotto sleep - mattress review 

"If the mattress world was a movie about an a 1950s rag-tag baseball team that — against all odds — makes it to the top, then Zotto Sleep would be the unexpected kid requited at a local game with a killer swing who, in the end, makes the definitive home run." 

janome marine - sewing machine review 

"One of the things we like best about the Marine Magic Basic sewing machine is its intuitive design. We found that it barely required any consulting: you plug it in, connect the pedal, and the rest is pretty self-explanatory. And one more thing: weighing a marginal 5 lbs, the Janome Marine Magic is all too easy to transport, store, or walk around with like it’s a fashion accessory (we’ll have the pink one, thank you)."

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the big move - crowd funding campaign

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"Adulthood has been knocking on my door for a while. It came by when it knew I was home and when I didn't open, it shouted through the letter box: "I know you're in there I can see the tv is on through the window you're watching Say Yes to the Dress I can see it literally right now." It would call me at 6 in the morning, it would show up at my favourite cafe. It would wait outside the bar on a Friday evening and make it difficult for me to get my bike. I would be like, "You're coming on a bit strong buddy," and it would be like, "Do you think I like being this way? You're making me this way." I pretended I didn't know what it was talking about."


storytelling invitation - event

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"Some of you (mom) might remember--I did not pop into the world a  storyteller. This was definitely not for a lack of want and as a kid there was one thing I wanted  more desperately than my room being a swimming pool (or eating my way through a giant candy)--and that was being at the absolute centre of attention, always. And when I found out lying was a thing you could do to make your stories cooler? Oh man, the entire period of '96 to '06 is like a bad hangover blank of DID I REALLY RIDE A DRAGON TO SCHOOL or was that Sharon's mom picking me up with a car? Wait. Did--guys, did--did we try to rob a bank? Guys? Did--?"